Everyone has them. Those moments that grab you by the heart and shake the living shit out of you. I had one yesterday.
O had an endo appointment in Boston. We were driving in, talking about, of all things, Northern Ireland and the situation there now compared to ten or twenty years ago. Then we got on the topic of what we were going to discuss with Dr. Ricker. We talked about getting her on the study for the MM 722 prototype (which O wants just about as much as I do) and about how that works. She then said that she was talking to her school nurse about diabetes the other day, telling the nurse she had this endo appointment and the nurse said "You're the best diabetic I know."
Wham. Right in the chest. I choked out a laugh and a strangled "Well, that was nice of her to say," and as O prattled on about the nurse and the other things she had told O, my brain was screaming "But I don't want her to be the best diabetic. She should be the best piano player or best hopscotcher or best big-brother-botherer." Blah. And once again, I'm reminded, forcefully, how much I hate this fucking disease.