Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Why You Shouldn't Clean While Naked

Last night I decided I'd had enough and went upstairs to take a shower.

I'd started to get undressed while waiting for the water to heat up but it was taking forever. As I stood there in my holey t-shirt, I realized that the banister in the hall was absolutely filthy, so I rummaged around under my sink looking for some sort of cleaning implement. I found a baggie with a few ancient baby wipes in them. Perfect. No mess, and baby wipes work great on those grubby little finger prints that my children delight in leaving all. over. the. house.

I was scrubbing away, taking great satisfaction in seeing the white paint again, smirking in an "I'll show you, dirt" kind of way when I stood up.

That's when I realized my naked, white ass had been level with the landing window.

The curtainless landing window.

The curtainless landing window that is about 6 feet away from our neighbor's bathroom window.

I'm never leaving my house again.


Jess said...

*spits coffee and whoops*


JChevais said...


I thought shit like that only happened to me!

Patois42 said...

Heh heh heh.

AlaphGypsy said...


Yea, I'm guilty of the same types of offenses...until I realized my *neighbor-whom-I-detest* was CONSTANTLY watching in my house, so I put up think blankets behind the curtains over the windows on that side of the house....sucks to have to do that, but I'm not a fan of being watched by creepy old folks.

Opinionated Gifts said...

ok...I've stopped laughing long enough to breath.

Thank you for that.

Maggie said...

I bet they're going to be REALLY nice to you from now on. Really really nice!

Unknown said...

uh, how well do you know your neighbors?

Rachel said...


That has never ever happened to me.


No way.


Lori Lamb said...

Okay that has to be the funniest thing I've read or heard of in days. You made me laugh so hard I think I snorted. Good thing I'm home alone!

SM said...

I love the way you clean! Me, too! That was hysterical... Last night, and I post this only because I'm basically anonymous, my husband "cleaned" the tub by swishing his body around in an epsom salt bath. I high-fived him over it. Unfortunately, he was unable to get the sides of the tub "scrubbed."