Tuesday, October 25, 2005

The Letter to The Parents

Well, after calming down a bit (and only a little bit), here's what I wrote to Sam's parents. I haven't sent it yet because I want to talk to O about it first, but as long as she's ok with it, I'm going to mail it to them.

I also called the guidance counsellor at O's school and told him what was going on. He thought the letter was a good idea. I feel someone justified in sending it now, since a professional thinks I should. I was hoping I wasn't just being all mother bear-ish about this.

I hope you notice my restraint and lack of swearing. Had I written this last night it would have started "Dear Ignorant Asshats." Probably not the way to win friends....

It was brought to my attention that O wasn’t invited to Sam’s birthday party because you were worried about her having diabetes. I can understand your nervousness. The disease can sound scary when you don’t know much about it.

I do wish you had called and spoken to me about it. I would have been happy to answer any questions you may have had and to discuss how O handles her diabetes. She’s had it for over 8 years now, so it’s old hat for her. She can run her pump and check her sugar and is very self-sufficient. As long as she knows the carb counts of what she’s eating, she’s fine. If carb counts aren’t available, I’m just a phone call away to help her figure them out.

If you had called, I would have made myself available for the party. I would have been happy to stay at the house with her if that would have made you more comfortable. I am just a phone call away and since we also live in Xtown, it wouldn’t have taken much time for me to get there should an emergency have arisen.

O was upset that she didn’t get invited to this party and I was upset for her. We both work really hard to ensure that she leads a normal, everyday kid kind of life and I would have done anything in my power in order for her to have attended Sam’s party. I hate to see her excluded because of this. She shouldn’t be penalized because of her disease.



Jess said...


Kerri. said...

Very well said.

And the fact that you're checking with Olivia before you send the letter really resonates for me.

Sandra Miller said...

Good Letter, Julia.

I stumbled on your blog via a comment on Six Until Me.

My 10-yr old son was dx'd Type 1 just last year, and we're rapidly coming to appreciate some of the challenges facing him at school, and during social events.

Reading about those parents, and their willingness to punish your daughter by excluding her-- the only girl from her class not invited? That's just reprehensible!

You showed amazing restraint in your letter... don't know if I could do the same.

Take care, and if you haven't already, stop by my blog over at A Shot in The Dark. I'm adding a link to your blog this afternoon.


Jess said...

I think I might still refer to them privately as the Asshats, but you're right - this is much more civil....

Major Bedhead said...

Sandra, I've been reading your blog for a while. I like it. :) Thanks for the link. Once I figure out how to do that, I'm going to link to some of the D blogs I read regularly.

Thanks for the compliments. I was pretty impressed that I didn't swear at all, since I have a big potty mouth.

Olivia and I did talk last night and she does want me to send the note. So I will. I wonder if I'll get a reply....

Kerri. said...


If you need any help augmenting the Blogger template, let me know. You can just paste and update an HTML code ... it's a lot easier than it sounds.


Anonymous said...

Hi Julia,
Welcome to the (diabetes) blogosphere.

I also found you via SixUntilMe. Nice blog here. I was diagnosed 2.5 years ago, and it's just hitting me that this blood sugar crap really is FOREVER. Geez...

Anyway, visit me sometime at www.diabetesmine.com?


Anonymous said...

You showed remarkable maturity and restraint! I hope those other parents were chastened and ashamed.